soap box

update 6/1: linking up with Emily at chatting at the sky.

I want to write, for both of my readers, about a topic that's kept pretty quiet. Counseling. At least in the Christian realm it's usually talked about with whispers. I've come to the realization, however, that people need help, and God has granted some faithful men and women the gift of counseling. So many avoid seeking professional help because they're afraid others will think they are crazy or that they don't pray enough or have enough faith. I know this: I could not have gotten through this eating disorder relatively unscathed without professional help. I had no idea how to help me; Chris had no idea how to help me. Although my therapy today is non-intensive, I'm still there. Seeking support from Shirley as I walk this new road. I had a notable visit last week about which I've written in revision. (ed is the eating disorder.) Please, if you are up against a monster or know someone who is, seek help. And check yourself before you speak with derision about someone who is in counseling. We're just trying to get better.

revision
i had a full docket
to discuss with Shirley
yesterday
sadness dogs me from behind
change lies in wait
i talked and cried
an hour without a lull
when she closed my red folder
i thought she would say
get in here next week
you’ll never make it
but
she said
you’ve talked about a lot today
kendal
do you know what
you’ve described?
a life
you’ve barely mentioned
ed
you are living a life
and then
i approached the scale
and my weight
was right where it should be
and i
relaxed
smiled
leaned into this living